Trailers

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This is the third trailer I’ve seen now for the remake of Clash of the Titans, and I’m still not sure where I stand. On one hand I have the nostalgia for the original, absurd though it may be. On the other hand, this looks like it might not completely suck, which is rare for a remake these days. So I’m a bit torn. Check out this international trailer and let me know what you think:

Clash of the Titans storms into theaters March 26th.

Everyone knows The Wire was pretty much the greatest television show ever, right? If you haven’t seen it you should really stop reading this and go watch it. All five seasons worth.

Finished? Good. Now we can discuss. So now you know the first couple of seasons revolved around a drug kingpin named Avon Barksdale. Series creator David Simon loosely based that character (as well as his foot soldier Bodie) on a real Baltimore kingpin of the same name. Now there’s a documentary coming out about the real Avon Barksdale. It features the man himself, being interviewed by Wood Harris, who played him on TV. Check out the trailer:

Honestly, the trailer makes this look like it’s part bad documentary and part bad America’s Most Wanted recreations. But being a big fan of The Wire I think I have to check it out.

For more info head to Nah Right.

I would go on a long rant about how Hollywood needs to stop churning out craptastic adaptations of beloved old TV shows, but it’s late, I have a cold, and the NyQuil’s kicking in. So let’s just watch the ridiculous trailer for The A-Team and ponder how the hell anyone thought the guy that made the absolute disaster of a movie that was Smoking Aces could possibly be qualified to make a movie based on such a classic show:

BTW, I can’t decide if this is a trailer for The A-Team or a promo for the next batch of ridiculous movie myths they’ll try out on Mythbusters. “Hey Jaime, do you think it’s possible to survive a plane explosion by riding it out in a parachuting tank, then be able to shoot down planes with that tank?” “No Adam, that’s just fucking stupid. But we get to blow something up, so let’s try it!”

The A-Team smears poo all over a movie screen near you June 11th.

So far, with what I’ve seen from Kick-Ass, I’d have to say it’s appropriately titled. The tale of a normal schlub turned would-be superhero, without any powers, looks quirky, exciting, and fun. There are two new trailers out for it. The first is fairly normal. The second is a red band, and it is FAR from normal. Check them out:

Red Band “Hit-Girl” trailer

Kick-Ass comes to theaters April 16th.

I first saw this over Christmas, but since that’s the season of love and goodwill towards men, and this made me want to punch someone, I put it out of my mind. You may recall that there’s a remake in of The Karate Kid in the works, with Will Smith’s kid as the Daniel-san character and Jackie Chan as Mr Miyagi. At one point it was rumored to be renamed The Kung-Fu Kid, due to the inevitable Gen X backlash, but it appears they are sticking with the original title.

Now, I’m on the record being completely, 100%, totally against this. My reasons aren’t completely nostalgic either. I think the original completely holds up, so there’s absolutely no reason to update it. So it was with great trepidation that I watched this, the first trailer for the unholy debacle film:

OMFG, it’s worse than I thought. Instead of Pat Morita beating up high school kids we get Jackie Chan beating up 12-year-olds. The original seemed noble. This just seems like child abuse. Instead of Daniel-san practicing crane kicks on a pier we get Jaden Smith practicing on the great wall of China. Subtlety? Naaaaah. And instead of Mr Miyagi teaching karate by NOT teaching karate, we get Jackie Chan teaching karate by simply teaching karate. Where’s the fun in that? Paint the fence Daniel-san.

The most unbelievable part? He’s wearing a DETROIT LIONS SHIRT! Really? Seriously? How many of those did the Lions sell last year? What was higher, their wins in the last 2 years or the number of shirts sold?

The Karate Kid shits all over theaters June 11, 2010, but I promise, this is the last you’ll hear about it on this site.

Most of me wants to hate the remake of Clash of the Titans, if only because it seems like a continuation of Hollywood’s rape of my childhood. But a small part of me actually wants to like it. After the first trailer came out I was cautiously optimistic. Now there’s a second trailer out. Check it out, then we’ll discuss:

Release the Kraken. Awesome. But doesn’t it feel like they’re showing too much? Guess we’ll have to wait and see. Clash of the Titans hits theaters March 26th, 2010.

It seems like just yesterday we were talking about how great Robert Downey, Jr. was in Iron Man, yet it’s already time to start talking about how great he’ll be in Iron Man 2. The movie isn’t set to come out until May, but the first trailer is already out, and it’s good. Really good. Mickey Rourke looks like serious badass as Whiplash. Scarlett Johansson is as hot as ever. And Downey looks like he’s picking up where he left off the first one. Check it out:

Iron Man 2 flies into theaters May 7th, 2010.

Ridley Scott has a pretty damn good track record. Blade Runner. Alien. Gladiator. Matchstick Men. It’s hard to argue with that body of work. But still, when I saw he was joining forces with Russel Crowe again to make Robin Hood I was skeptical, mainly because of the source material. Sure, I have a soft spot in my heart for the Disney adaptation, but looking at it critically it’s not among their best work. The Kevin Costner version in the early 90s was a train wreck, and I’m not just saying that because my first real taste of rejection came at a church dance, with that stupid Bryan Adams song playing in the background (apparently she was thinking “Everything I do, I do it for you, including just walking away without a word when you ask me to dance”. I mean really, who does that? Either say “no”, or come up with an excuse, but don’t just walk away. At least I’m not bitter…). These less-than-stellar previous attempts had me worried that even the superb tag team of Scott and Crowe could make the tired story interesting again.

Well, there’s a trailer out now, and I’m not worried anymore. It actually looks quite a bit like Gladiator, which is fine by me. Check it out:

Pretty damn cool, right? Robin Hood storms into theaters May 14th, 2010.

It’s been a while since I’ve seen a good trailer remix or mashup, but this one qualifies. It mixes the dialogue from Clint Eastwood’s ode to elderly ass-kicking, Gran Torino, with the visuals from Pixar’s paean to late-life adventure, Up. When you get down to it, Eastwood’s Walt is pretty similar to Up’s Carl: old, bitter, and initially resentful of the young people around them. They both prove that despite their advancing age they are still capable of tremendous actions. And they both just want people to get off their lawn. Check out the mashup, though if you haven’t seen the movies you may not quite get it:

Yep, still looks good.

Toy Story 3 hits theaters June 18th, 2010.

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